When the Spoons Run Out and You Need a Nap

Hello beautiful readers—and fellow spoonies,

Are you tired? I’m tired.

Do you ever try to push through the tired… only to end up more tired? It’s a vicious cycle.

We do too much, and then the moment we finally sit down, the exhaustion hits—like a wave crashing against the shore. If you live with a chronic illness, this probably feels all too familiar. But even if you don’t, don’t discredit yourself. We all push past our limits sometimes.

About a year ago, I was listening to Glennon Doyle on her podcast We Can Do Hard Things. She said something that stuck with me (I’m paraphrasing):

"Why do we feel like we have to give 100% every day? What if I only have 80%?

Can’t I give 80% and that be enough?"

Preach, Glennon.

In the chronic illness world, we call ourselves spoonies.

Because being in pain is exhausting. And if you live with chronic illness, you know it’s not just the pain—it’s managing it. Planning around it. Anticipating it. That alone takes a toll on your mental and physical bandwidth.

So let me ask you—Are you a spoonie?

If you’re not sure what that means, here’s a simple way to understand it.

The Spoon Theory suggests that people with chronic illness start each day with a limited number of “spoons”—let’s say twelve. Each spoon represents the energy it takes to complete a task.

• Getting dressed? One spoon.

• Taking a shower? Maybe two.

• Cooking dinner? Three or four.

• And on harder days? Even the smallest things cost more.

Some key truths about Spoon Theory:

• Energy is limited—not unlimited

• Everyday tasks carry a cost

• You can “borrow” from tomorrow (but you’ll feel it later)

• And your energy can change daily depending on pain or fatigue

          (And yes—that last one is so true.)

But here’s the thing…Even if you don’t have a chronic illness, you’ve have days where you’ve used up everything you’ve got.

You know that feeling: “I’ve got nothing left in the tank.”

So this is me telling you—Sit down.

No, really. Sit down. You’re done for the day.

I’m giving you permission. And more importantly—you should give yourself permission.

And if anyone questions it, feel free to tell them:

“Wendy told me to sit down.”

If they have a problem with that, you can send them my way. I’ll happily have a word—like Dr. Robby from The Pitt did for his patient with her boss. (Yes, I’m a HUGE fan of the show.)

Rest matters. Because tomorrow, you get a new set of spoons.

Some days I run out by 11 a.m.Other days, I make it to 3 p.m.Rarely do I make it a full day—and I’ve learned to be okay with that.

Which brings me to this…I’m off my publication schedule.

And it’s because—I’m a spoonie.

My goal was to publish Regret No More by June. But life had other plans.

• I had COVID.

• We moved my in-laws into assisted living.

• We’re still packing up their condo.

• I’m working a part-time job.

• My body isn’t always cooperating.

Or maybe the simplest explanation is just this: Life.

But here’s the beautiful thing about being an indie author—My deadlines are

self-imposed. Which means… I can change them.

I know Benjamin Franklin famously said, “Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today?”

Sorry, Benny.

I’m a literary girl at heart—I think I’ll go with Mark Twain instead: “Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.”

And with that…

I wish you all adieu—and a very good afternoon nap.

With love, light, and gratitude, 

Wendy 💛